If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
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