So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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