I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
