im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
