just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
