i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
