It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
