The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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