Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
What changed your mind?
Being sober
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Randomize
