Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
