this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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