4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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