But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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