she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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