Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize