I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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