i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
