omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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