i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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