She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
there is puke in my bra ... again
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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