Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
