ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
You are the jesus of drinking
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
