I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
