at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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