My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
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I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
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It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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