pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
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