guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize