Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
