Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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