Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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