So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Randomize
