What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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