I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
