Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize