I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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