Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize