Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
