I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
