Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize
