Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Drunk is not a location!
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
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