Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
