Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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