Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
then he tried to convert me to islam
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?