I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
