is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
