I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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