Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
