I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
you had me at cake vodka
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
