i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
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