watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize