no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
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